Women with long fingernails are frustrated with the iPhone. Later in the hour, the war in Iraq, surging gas prices, and sky rocketing teenage pregnancy. But first, let's get back to talking about the iPhone.
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Womens, you so crazy.
But Erica Watson-Currie of Newport Beach was frustrated that the improvements didn't solve the fingernail problem. She and other women who have long nails -- as well as people of all genders with chunky fingers -- have real trouble typing on the iPhone. - LA TimesBig and tall folks have trouble riding roller coasters. You don't see Kings Dominion widening the tracks.
I have trouble not being awesome. You don't see me being less awesome.
In another article, this one on Yahoo!, a female ignoramus said that Apple was being misogynistic for not including a stylus for women with long finger nails.
Now that I think about it, I agree with this lady. You know, Apple should redesign en extremely profitable product just to cater to women with long finger nails.
What about male guitar players with long finger nails? How dare Apple neglect the feelings of men with long fingernails.
What about guys in comas? Huh? What about them? Dude wakes up, feels great. He's well rested, ready to go hiking or bike riding, maybe buy some new clothes depending on how long he was in the coma. Too bad the nurse failed to stop by his room to cut his finger nails. Now he's got long fingernails and can't use his iPhone to call his wife who's already forgotten about him and moved on.
What about Mermaids? The iPhone isn't waterproof and they aren't complaining.
How about Griffin's? Always flying around. They could use Google Maps to find Mount Olympus. With Eagle's talons in the front and Lion's claws in the back, what is the Griffin supposed to do? Bunch of jerks.
I think we're forgetting one other group that Apple has so callously pushed aside. My imaginary friend Poopdeck Pete is extremely mad that the iPhone is unusable by the imaginary friend community. He wrote Apple a letter but hasn't gotten a response. He can't even call his girlfriend. What if his girlfriend's conjuror stops believing in her? I'm not going through that again. You hear me! Never again!
Ok, that's enough. I've completely lost focus.
Maybe I'll have something better next time.
Oh, I almost forgot. 17 girls in Gloucester, Massachusetts, age 16 and younger, were involved in a pregnancy pact. Prediction. Gloucester, Massachusetts will have the highest concentration of regrets per household next year.
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